The Board
"What's Bob's name again?" the President of the Board asked, his eyes glossy from his sugar high.
"Frank?" Eunice suggested rather too quickly.
Hearing his name, Frank woke with a start, flicking a slow thumb at Bob who was meticulously lining up Cheetos with his fingers.
"He's Bob. I'm Frank," Frank said with a disgruntled sigh and instantly fell back to sleep.
Eunice shrugged. "He's new," she said with a cautious nod toward Bob, her mouth working over a chocolate chip cookie.
"Who's new?" Frank asked.
"Bob, who else," said the President of the Board. "Eunice, What's Frank's name again?"
Carried Away
They came one morning. Little men in plaid shorts and striped polo shirts.
Sheila knew instantly what they wanted. "What do you want?" she shouted from the front door.
"We want what you want," the smaller of the men said.
"I don't know what I want," Sheila declared in her typical confused state. "Do I need to call Varmint Collectors to dispose of you?"
"Now don't get carried away," the little man said.
"I'm not getting carried away!" Sheila stated angrily.
"If that's what you want," the man said, hefting the others onto his shoulders and disappearing into the morning.
Losing your Rs
"I've a fog in my thoat," Benny said with a humble mumble after returning from vacation.
Dan looked curiously at his friend. "What happened to your Rs? They're gone."
To which Benny answered, "Lost 'em in 'eno playing 'oulette, along with my gil fiend. She 'an off with a tuckdive."
"You can't live your life without Rs," Dan said with frankness. "Maybe a girlfriend, but not Rs. Go to 'Vegas. Win them back."
"Only Esses in 'Vegas." Benny was clearly distraught.
"Do you want your R back?" Dan asked.
"Yes, but I don't want to lose my S in 'Vegas."
